How to Give and Take Criticism like a Man
Nov 17, 2008 Uncategorized Hodge Podge
I just stumbled onto a great blog called “The Art of Manliness.” Made me think of the “Man Class” Steve just taught at Riv. Here’s the stated purpose of the site:
My idea for the Art of Manliness came about as I was reading Men’s Health magazine. It seemed to me that the magazine’s contents were continually going downhill, with more and more articles about sex and how to get six pack abs. Was this all there was to being a man?
(Note from Noel: I didn’t renew my Men’s Health subscription this year for the same reasons.)
And as I looked around at the men my age, it seemed to me that many were shirking responsibility and refusing to grow up. They had lost the confidence, focus, skills, and virtues that men of the past had embodied and were a little lost. The feminism movement did some great things, but it also made men confused about their role and no longer proud of the virtues of manliness. This, coupled with the fact that many men were raised without the influence of a good father, has left a generation adrift as to what it means to be an honorable, well-rounded man.
Let me say at the outset that this isn’t an ironic site (like the one I talked about last week). This guy seems seriously concerned about men learning to be men. I couldn’t agree more. It seems like we often find ourselves “reparenting” the very type of guy he is talking about here.
The first post I read was How to Give and Take Criticism like a Man and I couldn’t say “amen” more. Here’s an excerpt. Take some time to read the whole post, it’s really good.
Dealing with criticism is a skill every well-adjusted man should possess. We give and take criticism among our co-workers, our friends, and our family. Criticism is an important part of our personal self improvement, for it is other people who can point out mistakes and shortcomings that we can’t see because we lack objectivity. Unfortunately, many young men today don’t know how to offer and accept criticism like a man. Instead they handle criticism like little boys. When giving criticism, they opt only to give snide, cutting jabs that do nothing to improve the situation. When receiving criticism, they sulk, make excuses, and argue with the person criticizing them. Ask any teacher who has the nerve of giving a student a poor grade. Today’s students will cry and whine their way to a better one. Or worst of all, have their parents intervene. They simply don’t know how to respectfully accept criticism.
This particular topic is probably equally applicable to men and women (as many of the site’s topics are), but I have seen so many passive men who need to grow up in this area.
Beards, Whiteness, and the Trump Card of Ironic
Nov 14, 2008 Uncategorized Hodge Podge
So I am a big fan of the site Stuff White People Like. That’s why I was excited when someone from Riv walked up, introduced himself and handed me a copy of the book version of Stuff White People Like “to borrow.” People hand me unsolicited books “to borrow” all the time (which is an interesting and hard to keep track of phenomena). I digress…
I was flipping through the book today and I was disappointed at the number of chapters that were straight from the site.
Then, I came across #95: Beards!
Here’s an excerpt:
Beards have been in fashion with white people since the dawn of white people. However, for research purposes, the modern white beard emerged at the same time as the modern white person: the 60′s.
Over the next twenty years the beard would be strongly adopted by both rock stars and professors. For a white person, these are two of the most respected professions, so the ability to resemble either is seen as a very desirable trait…
White males have had much social success in recent years, as their facial hair says, “Look at me. I am manly enough to grow this beard…”
All of this was wonderful stuff to read.
Until I hit this paragraph:
In fact, the only white person who can top a bearded male is a white person who has grown ironic facial hair. These are the elite. They grow mustaches in various guises to show that they are so out of style that they are actually cooler than you.
What to do in an emergency
Nov 13, 2008 Uncategorized Hodge Podge
Thanks to my sister for this link to a parody of Ready.gov, http://homeland.gov.safenow.org.
It gives very practical information, based on the actual pictures from the Government’s site. For instance:
Try to absorb as much of the radiation as possible with your groin region. The current world record is 5 minutes, 12 seconds.
What should I teach on?
Nov 12, 2008 Uncategorized Hodge Podge
This fall was a marathon of teaching for me and now I am on a little break (which is very nice).
Normally, at this point I know what my next series or two are going to be. However, at this point I have no idea what to teach on.
Since my blog readers were so helpful in crafting the last series, I thought maybe you could help.
What should I teach on?
Politics
Nov 11, 2008 Uncategorized Hodge Podge
At Riv this past weekend, I went as political as I get publicly. Here’s the 5ish minute clip:
After this message, I had tons of people ask me the same question:
“You said to ‘honor and respect’ our governmental authorities. What about evil governments?”
Because of the sheer number of times I got this question, I figured I’d post my response here.
First of all, this is not something “I said.” It is something “God said.” I’m not making this up, you can find these verses in your very own Bible.
Romans 13:1-2,6-7
Everyone must submit to governing authorities. For all authority comes from God, and those in positions of authority have been placed there by God. So anyone who rebels against authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and they will be punished…Pay your taxes, too, for these same reasons. For government workers need to be paid. They are serving God in what they do. Give to everyone what you owe them: Pay your taxes and government fees to those who collect them, and give respect and honor to those who are in authority.
Again, these are not my words, they are God’s. We are to submit to, honor, and respect our governing authorities.
So, what about Evil empires?
Well, let’s go back to the time Paul was writing this letter. What was happening to the church? They were being persecuted. By whom? The government! Paul himself was being terrorized by the government! And yet he says we are to submit to, honor and respect our governing authorities.
The bottom line is our attitude. A Christ-follower’s attitude is to be above reproach. It is my opinion that we are to submit to our governmental authorities until such time comes that they usurp God’s authority and negate our freedom to obey him.
For example, if our government said I was required to perform gay marriages and they commanded me to do so, I would do two things:
1) I would disobey
2) I would bear the consequences with an honoring and respectful attitude
For more on this you can download a message I gave on a Christ-followers relationship to government by clicking here.
TIme for me to go political!
Nov 8, 2008 Uncategorized Hodge Podge
When I told one of my co-pastors Steve that the Lansing State Journal interviewed me about the election, he said “I bet they got a lot out of you.” The man knows me well.
I’ll have to pick up a physical copy because the LSJ is shrewdly only printing partial articles on their website now, but I already know my favorite part of the article. I’ve noted it here:
(via lansingstatejournal.com)
Noel Heikkinen, who is on the team of pastors at Riverview Church in Holt, has avoided discussing politics with the congregation, which represents a wide range of political views.
“This is the weekend when I’m going to tell them why,” he said.
See it? Kathleen Lavey (who wrote the article) didn’t even ask about this when we talked because she knows that we have a team of pastors out here. Considering how often reporters have wrestled with what “official title” to give me, I was stoked to see that show up.
Oh, did you see the other thing?
Yup…I’m kinda going political this weekend.
Who Do Ya Read?
Nov 6, 2008 Uncategorized Hodge Podge
I was inspired by a question asked at ChrisReeder.com. Simply, “What are your must read blogs?”
You can click on Link Love on my site to see all the sites I read on a regular basis. I have a “Daily Read” category which are the sites I tend to read in their entireties. The “Daily Skim” gets a cursory read and everything else gets whatever time I have left.
For the sake of this post, I looked over the list to find the blogs I can’t live without. My self-imposed rule was blogs that I rarely (if ever) skip. Here they are:
- Monday Morning Insight – My fav by far
- Seth Godin’s Blog – OK, this one is a close second to MMI
- Persecution.org – Daily updates on persecuted Christians around the world
- 43 Folders – Productivity guru Merlin Mann’s site
- Without Wax – This is one of the few pastors out there that blogs like I do (ministry, personal, passion stuff all glumped together)
- Church Marketing Sucks – Self Explanatory
- The Apple Blog – ‘Nuff Said
So…who do ya read?
Regret
Nov 5, 2008 Uncategorized Hodge Podge
This past week I taught on Regret at Riv and several people asked me for a copy of the email Paul sent me. Here it is:
When a person allows their regrets to hold them captive – it seems to me that it is the ultimate display of pride. To not forgive ourselves – when God died to forgive us for our mistakes/sins – aren’t we really saying that we think our sin is too great for Christ to forgive? Not to believe fully in His sacrifice – IS the ultimate display of pride and lack of humility. Our regret is somehow too great to forgive?
My Candidate Won!
Nov 5, 2008 Uncategorized Hodge Podge
In the most important election yesterday, the best candidate won. My son Jesse was elected Class Representative in a landslide victory. He stood for the important issues of our day: lunchroom noise control, hat Wednesdays, and orderly lines at recess.
Nice work, Representative Heikkinen!
