Beards, Whiteness, and the Trump Card of Ironic
Nov 14, 2008 Uncategorized
So I am a big fan of the site Stuff White People Like. That’s why I was excited when someone from Riv walked up, introduced himself and handed me a copy of the book version of Stuff White People Like “to borrow.” People hand me unsolicited books “to borrow” all the time (which is an interesting and hard to keep track of phenomena). I digress…
I was flipping through the book today and I was disappointed at the number of chapters that were straight from the site.
Then, I came across #95: Beards!
Here’s an excerpt:
Beards have been in fashion with white people since the dawn of white people. However, for research purposes, the modern white beard emerged at the same time as the modern white person: the 60’s.
Over the next twenty years the beard would be strongly adopted by both rock stars and professors. For a white person, these are two of the most respected professions, so the ability to resemble either is seen as a very desirable trait…
White males have had much social success in recent years, as their facial hair says, “Look at me. I am manly enough to grow this beard…”
All of this was wonderful stuff to read.
Until I hit this paragraph:
In fact, the only white person who can top a bearded male is a white person who has grown ironic facial hair. These are the elite. They grow mustaches in various guises to show that they are so out of style that they are actually cooler than you.
November 14th, 2008 at 9:07 am
I love reading that site.
November 14th, 2008 at 9:27 am
hey we are beard buddies! yeah!!!
cept mine is starting to get a ton of grey hair..ugh. old…
November 14th, 2008 at 11:22 am
I’ve got plenty of the gray too, my friend.
November 14th, 2008 at 12:43 pm
So which are you?
– The Rock Star or the Professor?
November 14th, 2008 at 12:59 pm
Wow. Apparently you really are white, and the poster child for white beards.
On a side note, I’d like my name to be one of the words that shows up in your captcha gadget. Please get working on that.
November 14th, 2008 at 2:29 pm
Scott - I like to think I’m both.
Dave - At least I don’t have This beard.
November 15th, 2008 at 7:39 pm
This is a very proud moment for me…
November 16th, 2008 at 3:42 pm
i have laughed at many things over the years that you’ve posted noel, but it’s been a long while since i laughed like i did at this one…
November 16th, 2008 at 3:52 pm
Happy to serve.
November 17th, 2008 at 6:47 pm
I actually rocked a mustache for an entire month earlier this year. The irony was cool, but the disbelieving stares of loathing and utter contempt I got from complete strangers forced me to remove the vile growth.