Al Gore Places Infant Son In Rocket To Escape Dying Planet
Aug 7, 2008 Uncategorized
Via The Onion, this is brilliant…
Al Gore—or, as he is known in his own language, Gore-Al—placed his son, Kal-Al, gently in the one-passenger rocket ship, his brow furrowed by the great weight he carried in preserving the sole survivor of humanity’s hubristic folly.
“There is nothing left now but to ensure that my infant son does not meet the same fate as the rest of my doomed race,” Gore said. “I will send him to a new planet, where he will, I hope, be raised by simple but kindly country folk and grow up to be a hero and protector to his adopted home.”
As the rocket soared through the Gore estate’s retractable solar-paneled roof—installed three years ago to save energy and provide emergency rocket-launch capability in the event that Gore’s campaign to save Earth was unsuccessful—the onetime presidential candidate and his wife, Tipper, stood arm-in-arm, nobly facing their end while gazing up in stoic dignity at the receding rocket, the ecosystem already beginning to collapse around them.
August 7th, 2008 at 10:14 am
I LOLd when I read the headline & SCOMN (sprayed coffee out my nose)!
August 7th, 2008 at 1:13 pm
insightful
August 14th, 2008 at 6:10 am
Kal-Al will have super-human DWI abilities unlike his future planet has ever seen before.